Fashion Avant-gardist Gifts

"Don't you think the wedding outfit a bit over the top on a first date, dear?"

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

"Well, yes, it's not what you would call a practical nest, but my wife insisted on using an architect..."

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

Look At Me I'm Still Wearing Shorts.

'It's cutting edge theatre.'

"Avant-garde jazz hands"

"We tried 'Baby Mozart,' but he prefers 'Baby John Cage.'"

When at a loss for words Colin would often resort to communicating through the medium of contemporary dance.

The Cremaster Cycle

'I don't know whether to put it in for the Turner Prize or go for the Poet Laureate.'

'Isn't that wonderful? We both suffer from intellectual angst!'

Blend Schools

'I saw an offbeat play the other night. No one took off their clothes.'

"I'm outside the fancy dress shop...."

"I can deal with the conceptual art and electronic music, but what are these hors d'oeuvres supposed to be."

"Please turn on your cell phones."

Richard Wagner's other Ring Cycle.

Cover Design for the Savoy (No. 8)

Artist uses connect-the-dots canvas to paint nude model.

'God, it's a relief to get away from that exhibition of a bit.'

'As a hairdresser, I must say you take it a bit far.'

James Joyce

Ave Atque Vale- Illustrates Beardsley's Translation of Carmen CI of Catullus

A retriever comes back to a hunter with Brancusi's 'Bird in Space'."

Tracey Emin

Toilet Art.

"Stop complaining, granite is in."

The Death of Pierrot

"Once upon a time there were these three little pigs. There was a neurotic little pig, a psychotic little pig, and a normal little pig . . . ."