Automotive Mechanic Gifts

"Here's your problem."

Parts of an automobile

Joe's Tire Shop.

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

'My electric car is giving me static!'

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

"Take me to your mechanic."

Driverless cars rage.

"Somehow, they get exempted from a lot of laws."

"They retired me. Just like that. Seems I'm no good over 55 mph anymore." "How does that make you feel?" "Like I want to bash my head against a wall!"

Wow. Totaled. Teen Test Dummy.

"Tell Mrs. Pomeroy we've found the source of that strange hint of musk."

'I said they're good, but expensive.'

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

'This is Onstar, how may I help you?'

Rodin's Cattle-Grid

No caption (A crash test dummy in the shape of a bird flies toward a window. Other birds dressed as scientists study the experiment from the ground).

CLEAR!

'Take us to your crash test facilities. We're here to liberate our compatriots!'

Organic Soldering.

'I think I've isolated that funny noise you've been having.'

"We'll get there when we get there!"

'I found what was making those funny noises.'

"So this is what you want? This is why after school, almost every day, you spend all your extra free time working at the auto store?"

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

'They don't make cars like they used to.'

'According to the diagnostic computer, your problems are due to El Nino.'

'I tell you what: If it weren't for the headrest, I would have serious whiplash right now...'

Turmoil change.

"I've narrowed the problem down to somewhere under this big flap I discovered."

"We located the hissing noise, Mr. Watkins. Your wife's mother is in the back seat."

'A 50's vintage automobile...a billiards room. YOu, my firend, have got it all.'