Auto Mechanics Gifts

Leon's Auto Salvage and Center for Interpretive Dance

Rust test in progress.

Road-rage speedometers.

"Uh...not to be bossy, but I wouldn't do it that way."

'The beauty of this model is that it can easily be reassembled.'

"I can't work on this one. It's too ticklish."

I got a car for the weekend!

'They don't make cars like this any more -- the country that built them disappeared.'

"You know, Baldo...someday, you might have your own auto parts store."

"What does your father do for a living?"

"You still working on your car?"

"I know what I'm talking about. That battery is dead."

"Can you give me a rough idea of how much over the top your estimate will be?"

"Next time you buy a car... can you ask if it is self assembly?"

"You're a quart low."

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

'My electric car is giving me static!'

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

'This is Onstar, how may I help you?'

'I said they're good, but expensive.'

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

Prepare to meet thy mechanic.

'I think I've isolated that funny noise you've been having.'

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

Organic Soldering.

CLEAR!

"So this is what you want? This is why after school, almost every day, you spend all your extra free time working at the auto store?"

'According to the diagnostic computer, your problems are due to El Nino.'

'I tell you what: If it weren't for the headrest, I would have serious whiplash right now...'

Turmoil change.

"I've narrowed the problem down to somewhere under this big flap I discovered."

"We located the hissing noise, Mr. Watkins. Your wife's mother is in the back seat."