Auto Maintenance Gifts

'D.N.A. tests show that the fuel pump doesn't belong to this car.'

Regular servicing protects your warranty, and your family from psycho mechanics.

Kwiki-Fix Garage. With add-on charges, the sum is much greater than the parts.

Garage. Tell the scoutmaster we fixed his broken horn. Beep repaired!

What a hypochondriac --- He's always turning on his "check engine" light!

Gas tank is holding up a customer for money 'Fill 'er up!'

'It's not just a funny noise, ma'am, it's a very expensive funny noise.'

Strategic Wiper Adjustments: "Up just a tiddle..."

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

'My electric car is giving me static!'

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

Deflator mouse

"Take me to your mechanic."

"I'd like a new tire for my 1976 Chevy Chevette."

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

'You change him, and I'll change the tire.'

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

'I said they're good, but expensive.'

CLEAR!

"So this is what you want? This is why after school, almost every day, you spend all your extra free time working at the auto store?"

Prepare to meet thy mechanic.

Organic Soldering.

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

'I found what was making those funny noises.'

'According to the diagnostic computer, your problems are due to El Nino.'

"One more rinse and the inside of your car will be clean too, Dad."

'I tell you what: If it weren't for the headrest, I would have serious whiplash right now...'

"I've narrowed the problem down to somewhere under this big flap I discovered."

'A 50's vintage automobile...a billiards room. YOu, my firend, have got it all.'

"We located the hissing noise, Mr. Watkins. Your wife's mother is in the back seat."

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

'Rats, I don't think we'll ever get this thing going: It's flooded again...'