Auction Hunting Gifts

"Sotheby's extends its deepest sympathies and wonders whether the deceased might have owned any early German Expressionist pieces."

'You have a Remington etching that has a mate somewhere of this coach scene. . . if you had the mate and cleaned the etching it would be worth $5,000 at auction. . . by itself $150.'

"And for lot 27 we have another old tennis ball."

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

E-Baying @ The Moon

Invisible clothes

Sold! For £42,000 to the... No wait - it's the wrong way round!

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

Auctioneer: 'Sold to the lady whose husband just walked out!'

An early Picasso painting is sold at auction - it is a painting from when Picasso was a child

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"I'm sorry, honey. I thought you'd be happy that your germ-ridden blanket was such a hit on eBay."

'Did you auction off our house on eBay?'

'Take five Harry, I'm going on ahead to scout for sales'

"It's called 'Sold'."

'Even down here we never lose our sense of humor!'

"I got it from eBay."

The Derby- Horse Auction at Tattersall's

Moderne Auction Today - This end up!

"I got the cream, but the bulk of the old lady's estate is going to auction."

I think you just paid £5000 for cricket box, not a box at the cricket.

The Battle of the Pictures.

'You bought it - you can lie in it!'

Titanic iceberg auction

'Greece is up for auction on eBay - and there's no bidders.'

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

This isn't a good time to see him --- He just got outbid for a soul on eBay. Beelzebub.

"We've been milked all day at the office. Now we girls deserve a little R&R."

'Of course, some assembly is required. That's why my bid was so low.'

'Enough EBAY already!'

'Now, what am I bid for this original Ough?'

How much for a blueberry scone? $3.25. I'll give you $1.20. Huh? $1.40. $1.45. It's not negotiable. Shrewd. $1.65. $2.00. $2.10. $2.25, but I want free shipping! Ebay addicts. $3 for your sandwich. $6.

Leonardo da Vinci painting - $450 million record.

"... $3 million, I have $3 million. Can I get $4 million? Yes, $4 million ..."