Auctions Gifts

Butterfly Auction

It was too late to retract her bid. Catherine had purchased the small man on the motorbike'

Police and victim standing in empty room - 'Looks like your wife has discovered selling on ebay'.

As she left the mall, Audrey found a way to rake in some cash.

David Dickinson

Sold! For £42,000 to the... No wait - it's the wrong way round!

'Sold to the gentleman with the hysterical wife.'

'Enough EBAY already!'

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

Classic Car Auction: "I think I'm having an out-of -money experience."

"The bidding will begin at twenty million dollars."

'Next, lot 234; an extremely rare estate agents

On some of the paintings my right brain says they're good art, but my left brain says they're bad investments. On others, my right brain says they're bad art, but my left brain says they're good investments.

'You look like an honest man - but perhaps we can still use you.'

Man on ebay not bothering to bid as he has 'preferred bidder status'.

"I got it from eBay."

'Sold! $287,500 to bidder #349!'

Book signing. 'Who shall I put it to?' 'Ebay, please.'

"I call him auction man - his hair is going, his teeth are going, his sex drive has gone."

Homeowners.

The Derby- Horse Auction at Tattersall's

Donkey searches for carrots on eBray.

"I've got seller's remorse!"

'You're not bidding on something again, are you? . . . So when some goofy item and a debit in our account show up at roughly the same time, I am to assume what?'

"Go. Do my bidding."

'Stamp auction' WW2 Victory stamps on two fingers

'He made his first purchase on Ebay today.'

A lot of auctioneers

US President Auction

'You bought it - you can lie in it!'

Sticky Gas Pads Auction

'Rodin's phone bid'

'All in favor, touch your nose and lift your left eyebrow.'

'That's a decent offer but if I wanted to sell my soul, I would put it up for bids.'

'Any advance on eighteen months?...Do I hear two y...oh, sorry/ I forgot where I was for a moment.'