Attending An Award Ceremony Gifts

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Buisnessman Of The Hour - I'd like to introduce our guest but he is 45 minutes late

'Sure you won 'Contractor of the Decade' five times, McWit, but what have you done lately?'

Win - win

'For the actress who benefitted most by rehab...'

'My hot-shot assistant was named as one of the top 10 to watch."

Employee of the Month

'And now I'd like to name this month's recipient of the Dumbest Global E-mail Award...'

Jungle Games

"Ladies and gentlemen, I simply can't believe that I've won this award. I keep wanting to pinch myself."

On the cusp of winning the Nobel, Bernie gets exposed by his third grade handwriting teacher.

Oscars 2024

"And the award for Best Product Placement in a Domestic or Foreign Film goes to..."

Barbie Oscars

"I would like to thank all the big and little and in between people."

"Are you sure he tested negative?"

"Oh my goodness. My lecture on John Donne has just been awarded Most Pizzazzy Metaphysical Lecture of the Year."

'Wow! Oh, wait -- It's only a Nobel consolation prize.'

"I'd like to thank my family, but, to be honest, I'm pretty sure I could've done it without them."

Oscars acceptance speech.

Teacher of the Year: "Accepting for Susan Curtis is her clinical psychologist."

"I'd like to thank everyone who believed in me."

Oscars

"The idiots don't realise that flying in a private jet is meant to be IRONIC!"

'My thanks go first to the Nobel Committee for this great honor, and to my son who encouraged me to keep my mind agile with word games, and puzzles.'

"First, I'd like to thank everyone who believed in me."

'And I would like to thank all those people who helped me write this book...'

Using the skill of pottery to make athletics trophy.

"I want to thank all the little people."

Dolphin wins the swimming competition.