Artsy Philosopher Gifts

Sculptor creating repeating self-portrait sculptures.

College. Did you pick a major yet? I'm doing a double major in art and logic --- I want to draw my own conclusions!

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

"...You talking to me? Well, I'm the only one here... You talking to me?!" "Narcissus De Niro"

"The raw material was all around me: That's how I got started as a sculptor..."

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

"Eye of pie...a**e of rat...p**s of newt."

"Maybe I don't like stunning debuts."

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

'Oh-oh -- What hath He wrought now?'

"If you saw a book with the title 'An American Speaks Out,' would you buy it?"

High School Schedule

Hamlet in the craft shop.

Harmon Silas, calculating the thousand words his picture is worth, wonders what do do with contractions.

'Mind if I join you?'

'You'll never get the Burgundy stain out, so let's just color the whole thing.'

'I ink, therefore I am....'

'I ink, therefore I am....', IF DESCARTES HAD BEEN A CARTOONIST

Who's torturing a crow? I'm practicing my play. It's art! Which opens your mind to life's important questions. Right. Like what is art? Or do we need little brothers?

RBG, RGB, CMYK

'Max really likes those genetic markers.'

Jackson Pollock makes a mistake: 'Guess I'll have to start over.'

Oak Tree Painted in 1642

'Perhaps this will give you inspiration son?'

Rodins rotten juggler

"now let's try one without the tusks."

KNITEO ERGO SUM!

Operation Tattoo

'I am afraid, sir, that in the current economic climate, a picture is now only worth 500 words.'

Steam of Consciousness

"I didn't even realise Mondrian ever had a triangular period!"

"If you drink eight glasses of water every day, you'll due fully hydrated."

"It's too academic."

"I've been an emerging artist for ten years now..."

'I'm going to soak for three days, then Andre here is going to sculpt me into an entirely new body shape with the pumice stone.'