Art Student Gifts

"Impressive, Meyers, but let's stick to your quantitative projections."

Pablo Picasso: Before Puberty...After Puberty.

A naked, shell-less Snail posing for art student snails.

'Today's unwilling nude model is Ralph.'

'Apparently all my creative juices have seeped into the left side of my brain.'

Picasso's learning years.

Jackson Pollock makes a mistake: 'Guess I'll have to start over.'

"And if you'd like your artwork displayed please include a brief bio."

'I don't care if Jackson Pollock did start out this way. We are drawing kittens.'

'We have yellow ochre, but no mediocre. Maybe you misunderstood the teacher.'

'I'm sorry...we're not sure you're self obsessed enough.'

Art Plagiarism

'Do you intend to sell it privately, Smith, or donate it to the nation. . .?'

Painting Mona Lisa.

'Abstract art is supposed to look that way.' (A rather smarthy attitude in an art gallery)

'No I don't have scissors you can borrow.'

'Come on Ted, you've been doing this class for 3 years now, it's time you progressed beyond the 'stick' movement...!'

Jackson Pollock - "Oh no! Someone's thrown paint all over it!"

"You moved!"

"There'll be no nudes in this life drawing class!"

'This guy is really good!'

Damien Hirst's art teacher

Vincent Van Og.

German School

"You've got a long, long road ahead of you, young man."

"There's no drawing, no painting, no sculpture. You just talk about things you'd like to do"

'I've been told I have Rembrandt's golden glow.'

'Today's unwilling nude model is Ralph.'

"Your technique looks so familiar - were you also trained in murder at RISD?"

"An unfortunate museum gift shop." "Banksy activity set." "Jackson Pollock coloring book." "MC Escher building blocks." "Claes Oldenburg miniatures." "Marceau Marceau CDs." "Seurat's connect-the-dots aaAAAAA."

Happy little clouds

"I'm afraid you were drawn too big and not centered on the page."

The Artist

"So, Owen tells me you guys met in art school."

Cubism Model