Art Sleuth T-Shirts

"It's old Mister Banks, the wealthy, establishment art figure!"

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

'Are you sure this is authentic ancient Indian art?'

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

'It's not for myself, you understand."

"Excuse me, Professor. I think I might have spotted a flaw in your theory!"

'The dog ate my homework -- I thought maybe you could X-ray him.'

"I need to self isolate. . . but I thought I'd better come in and see you first!"

Roentgen tries to figure out what he's discovered.

Private Viewing

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

Jerry's 'culture-vulture' persona was plunged into jeopardy when he mistook a light switch for a modern art installation.

Art Plagiarism

"Essentially Wilkins proves things and Brenner disproves them."

"Unfortunately, what you downloaded from the net is a ten-year-old paper I once wrote for my college boyfriend!"

Medical Library - Large books with really revolting photographs

IRS, 'I think we should audit this one, sir -- his signature looks shaky.'

'I've forgotten the author and title - do you read minds?'

Undercover Biophysicists

GM Crops Genie.

"According to stomach content analysis he'll be dead in half an hour."

Newton's Law and Order.

"A conundrum, rather than an outright mess, I think, Mrs Ellis..."

Mysteries.

'Hey, it's that peeping Tom again, the one who has no respect for privacy.'

"I'm a brilliant stalker and love photography, so I thought: why not?"

Galileo describes his discoveries to the church (and gets hit over the head by the bishop/pope with the telescope that he made the discoveries with).

The Animal Researcher Reports...'I've been watching this herd of cattle for seven years, and to be frank, I haven't seen them do anything yet!'

'She didn't notice it was a wolf and not her grandma?? Had grandma never heard of electrolysis??'

Schrodingers cat at the vets

'So far we don't have any suspects.'

Optician and the PI.

'Trying to steal secrets again, Dr. Figowitz?'

"Light at the end of the tunnel!"

'It's Yorick all right - I know his DNA well.'