Art Project Curator Gifts

'You'll have to bring in your own refrigerator.'

'Hurry, wipe it off before Dad comes home!'

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

Paul Klee

"I think he was a celebrity."

"I'm beginning to regret taking this job at the local playgroup."

'It's a Joan Biro.'

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"His mother had a great influence on him. She always made him eat his fruits and vegetables."

Mr. Empirical With "Antarctica""Small is hostile. Rage contributes to shift away from literality. I'm off to True Value Hardware for some more self-reference tools."

Schools of Art - A Rough Guide.

'Projectile painting.'

Well, you know these child prodigies - they can be very demanding about how their work is displayed.

Painting taking root...

It's a call from Tate modern.

Misunderstood artist

The Kitchen area of a Whitechapel Boarding House

'I could do that.'

Couple Sitting in Front of A Sunset.

'No, Timmy, we are not supposed to connect them.'

'I imagine you'll be asking for a full refund.'

"I was going to call it 'Empty Plinth', but then I settled on 'Winter's Smile'...I wanted to capture the 'nothingness' of an 'absence of anything'..."

Frederic Auguste Bartholdi

The Rise of Modern Art

Children's Art Show.

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

Convenience.

Rodin's Browser

"Now this I get."

'Number two. That's the art that offended me.'

'From an aesthetic perspective, it has heart, beauty and intrigue, but is it a viable process design?'

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

Three street vendors sit side by side selling their art; two of the vendors are selling normal paintings while the third is a Neanderthal selling cave paintings.