Art Defender Gifts

'Tell the court please, why did you steal the painting?'

"Objection, Your Honor! Alleged killer whale."

'Are you sure this is authentic ancient Indian art?'

Please buzz off. That's my flower!

'Shouldn't we spend a little time on the ARTS?'

Tina Turner

'I said: Leave my son alone!'

Art Plagiarism

'There was a time I thought humans were as smart as we are.'

Hoxton map.

'Two men having a sword fight with large pen and pencil.'

Quadruple dark hot chocolate. Whoa, everything all right? Sure, yeah, great. I'm a journalist and writer in an era in which the printed word has been totally devalued by free distribution of information on the internet. Can I pay in prose? Point taken.

Funding Cuts for the Arts

Painter's Duel.

"Humans destroy our natural habitat and then say we're an invasive species."

"Now on view: Old paintings by dead white men through whenever…"

Please help: National Endowment for the Arts

"But. . . editorial cartoons can make readers think!"

The Death of Marat

'For our specials today, we'll despoil our shared environment, filthy-up the air, completely ignore the rules of good global manners and cyber attack all your systems. . .'

Fish with Shield

"Know anything funny I could turn into a cartoon?"

A finger painting a painting of a vase and flowers.

A stick figure evolving into a more realistic-looking man

Art Theft

A Low Budget Philharmonic Orchestra

'Is it a real Lichtenstein, Brad - or yet another parody?'

"Viewers should be advised: the following debate on public funding for the arts contains violence and adult language."

Landlord makes a song and dance about the rent at a theatre

"I've been sent from the future to stop Harper Lee from complicating the legacy of a beloved fictional character."

An angry group of Rhinoceros have finally found the Poachers responsible for cutting off their horns.

Bug: A Fingerplay to Promote Empathy with the Differently Evolved

Useful vs. Wasteful Spending . . . Arts Programs and Missile Defense Programs.

"Eh, who cares if climate change is killing birds? I'll just make more."

The Moth Menace.