Armchair Evolutionist Gifts

"It's an enduring mystery. How did this extinct species combine such huge brains with such jaw dropping stupidity?"

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

"Fred's calculating what future natural catastrophes he can ignore based on his probably life span."

"Do you honestly believe we evolved from a single snow flake?"

"Feel free to take notes."

Figures from 'Ascent of Man' diagram all do the Conga: 'Let's all fo the Conga, na-na-na-na ...'

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

'It's really more of a family forest than a family tree.'

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

'I think I'll stay in and try to catch up on my reading.'

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

Evolution Exam Results.

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

Canine obidience class: 'He wouldn't budge from the armchair.'

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

"So what makes you think you're qualified for this job?"

The intellectual.

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

"I think we may be related!"

"Darling, I think we need to talk about where this relationship is going..." Male evolution.

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

"I'm an evolution denier. There's no way those people come from us."

'That's Oog -- he got a haircut and a job.'

"Where are you going? I said we need to talk."

The dangerous world of the armchair thinker

"I couldn't care less if being Homo Sapiens is the latest trend. While you're living in our cave, you better act like a true Neanderthal."

"Are we there yet?"

Fish evolving: 'Write, if you establish a niche.'

Brains - Java Man, Neanderthal Man, Modern Man.