Armchair Defender Gifts

'So, my Daughter's told you all about me, has she?... And did she mention how violent I get when someone sits in my chair?'

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

Bowled over again!

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

"I always forget what an expert I am in curling."

'At least now the injury worries are over, we can concentrate on slagging off the team.'

"All of a dither as per usual!"

A bunch of baseball players sitting on a baseball diamond watching TV.

Putting Practice.

'I hate bloody football! It's just a bunch of over-rated, overpaid nancy boys kicking a b-' - 'Genuine football fans may leave work early to avoid missing the start of important World Cup fixtures.' - 'C'mon England!'

Captive Audience at the World Cup.

"Tragic case of having the fridge from the TV when the World Cup is showing."

"Actually, Burt's weathering the stay-at-home thing pretty well."

"Goal!"

'John is watching the game under protest.'

'The Wilsons picked up a quarterback in the off-season. The Riveras picked up a quarterback. The Ludwigs picked up a quaterback...'

"Honey, come quick! This guy in the comments section just solved the Middle East crisis."

'She's not very good. She only did three revolutions and her air wasn't all that much.'

'Call 911! He watched 12 straight hours of football without training adequately.'

"This is his fifteenth successive Olympics."

'...'Fire the coach'...'Fire the coach'...'Fire the coach'...'

"Thursday-Morning Quarterback"

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

"There's more to life than beer and football...I just can remember what it is."

Man watching football on T.V. in armchair made of beer cans.

'He gets confused switching channels between the World series and NFL games.'

'I'll take the one on the right.'

'Get him in a full nelson, you dolt! You'll never pin him with a Heimlich maneuver!'

'War protestor': 'Oh no! Not this again...'

'We're sure they're in there... but we're not certain if they have weapons of mass destruction.'

'Which channel would you like to tut at tonight?'

Football Game Tickets. These seats are so far from the field we'll need a passport to get to them!

Inactive wear store.

"It was your father's idea - He can't bear to miss a second of the game."