Armchair Adventurers Gifts

"I've passed your complaints along to the captain."

Extreme moderation

Inventions

'This has the makings of their toughest season ever.'

'Me? Dislocated thumb from switching channels to catch all the Olympic events. . .'

'Flight simulator'

'After researching our dream vacation online with reviews, commentaries, we cams and pictures, we felt we'd been there and didn't need the trip!'

A knight sent to kill a dragon armed with a fly swatter

Technological Dependence.

Travelogue

"Most of the time it's 'Me Tarzan, you Jane', until we get into the bedroom. Then he's all, 'You Tarzan, Me Jane'."

"They remove people who have become 'jammed in armchairs' due to COVID 19 lockdown!"

'This one is a bit different - twelve Indian call centres in eight days.'

'I think it's the best thing you've ever done!'

Unknowingly, with one swish of his blood soaked mammoth tail he was inflicting pain and suffering on billions of unborn people. Home decorating had been invented.

"Just the slippers is fine!"

Newfangled contraceptions phobia: 'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

'What's on the other side?...'

"Yeah, and the new job lets me work from home."

The lesser known active volcanoes.

"Damn, I forgot to pack a jumper."

'I wanted somewhere like England, but in Spain.'

'Thank you - but I prefer to stand.'

London map drawn from memory.

'Are you guys still watching the tapestry? Why don't you go outside it's such a nice day!'

The trips postponed by La Covid continue

Advanced Zen for Couch Potatoes: Earl becomes One with his Lazy-Boy.

Saguaro Cacti.

"No, we’re not lost, Claire. And yes, I have seen ‘Deliverance’!"

Skier.

Reading room

Suitcase stickers say 'Nowhere'.

"Question ... what is my motivation to ever leave this armchair?"

Marco Polo