Arithmetically Challenged Pillows

'No Jason, you can't call tech support.'

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

Can't Do the Math/Won't Do the Math.

Math Dreams

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

Girl does mathematical equation. Man says 'Tut! Teenagers today and their problems ...'

'I got 100 in school today. 50 in history and 50 in maths.'

'I'll give you a clue. The answer is a number, not a fruit.'

"And now, a little theorem for all you lovers out there."

"Sorry mum, but I just don't get the decimal system..."

"I know it may be wrong, but it's how I feel."

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

"Gifted class, indeed! One is gifted in science, but can't rad - one is fixed in reading, but won't even try math..."

"Or we could tally the sheep like this."

'I know! It's what I had last night for dinner.'

"Arithmetic gets a lot harder when you run out of fingers and toes."

'Maths is fun!'

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

"I was planning to grow old with Matthew Nelson, but it looks like I'll be growing old with my algebra teacher."

'I think I must be ambidextrous. I can calculate interest with both sides of my brain.'

'190 divided by two...'

'Unemployed math grad. Will solve quadratic equations for food."

Mr. Defner's drive-in algebra class was retro cool, controversial and somewhat effective.

'Brilliant, Prof.Brainstorm. Any fool can come up with a new product, you've come up with a new tax break.'

Math Teacher

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

"I'm Albert, your new mathematics teacher, but you can call me Al."

"When the teacher explained negative numbers, I suddenly understood how politicians 'deficit spend'."

'Dad 'If Jack brought 10,000 shares at $3 and he sold 75% of them to Larry for $8 before the value went down to $2, what did Jack end up with?''

'My name is Jeremy and I approved this message.'