Math Challenger Pillows

'If the multiplication table is so important, how come Oprah never talks about it?'

"Of course, I could be wrong."

'Well, you're lousy at Maths, but I'm sure you'll become a great CEO one day...'

'My client is advised not to answer that question.'

Girl does mathematical equation. Man says 'Tut! Teenagers today and their problems ...'

"It says 'break glass' but it doesn't say what glass!'

"Sorry mum, but I just don't get the decimal system..."

"Excuse me, Professor. I think I might have spotted a flaw in your theory!"

'I don't care if he does have an I.Q. of 169. I still think he's faking.'

"I was planning to grow old with Matthew Nelson, but it looks like I'll be growing old with my algebra teacher."

'And from this point follow me very carefully.'

"Well, I can't figure it out either. Do we know anyone that can help us with math homework?"

AI

'I wish there were true and false questions on math tests. At least that way I'd have a 70% chance of getting one right.'

'I was born with math immunity, so I'm special. I know that.'

Trickle down

'Math isn't really my long suit, Mrs. Ferguson -- how about I just take a drug test?'

'Why do it the easy way when you can do it the right way?'

'I've gotten over my fear of tests, but now I seem to have developed studying anxiety.'

"'I'm checking my answers."

"They were apparently more advanced than we thought."

"Learning percentages has made me realize there's a 50% chance I'll flunk math."

When fuzzy math's happens to sharp accountants

Can you tell me how to sue you for flunking me out of law school?

Yeah, maybe replacing the clay pigeons with clay big game wasn't smart.

"No wonder the students can't solve the problem. I can't solve the problem."

"I've discovered I don't have a head for figures."

In case of computer breakdown break glass

G.P.S. for Poor Math Students

"My paper will revolutionise our perception of core scientific principles..."

Switch if off!

Sometimes my willpower needs a little reminding. Stop looking at your phone.

"How are we supposed to eat homework when it's all digital?"

'Jack has two apples and three apples. That adds up to six.'

No New Thoughts