Arithmetically Challenged Gifts

'No Jason, you can't call tech support.'

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

'Einstein, the children are getting too complex for me.'

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

'But I digress...'

Can't Do the Math/Won't Do the Math.

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

Math Dreams

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

Girl does mathematical equation. Man says 'Tut! Teenagers today and their problems ...'

'I got 100 in school today. 50 in history and 50 in maths.'

'I'll give you a clue. The answer is a number, not a fruit.'

"Sorry mum, but I just don't get the decimal system..."

"And now, a little theorem for all you lovers out there."

"I know it may be wrong, but it's how I feel."

'I know! It's what I had last night for dinner.'

"Gifted class, indeed! One is gifted in science, but can't rad - one is fixed in reading, but won't even try math..."

"Or we could tally the sheep like this."

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

"Arithmetic gets a lot harder when you run out of fingers and toes."

'I think I must be ambidextrous. I can calculate interest with both sides of my brain.'

"I was planning to grow old with Matthew Nelson, but it looks like I'll be growing old with my algebra teacher."

'Maths is fun!'

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

'190 divided by two...'

Mr. Defner's drive-in algebra class was retro cool, controversial and somewhat effective.

'Unemployed math grad. Will solve quadratic equations for food."

Common Core Family Therapy

'Brilliant, Prof.Brainstorm. Any fool can come up with a new product, you've come up with a new tax break.'

"That was Copernicus on the phone – he says you're NOT the centre of the universe!"

Math Teacher

"I'm Albert, your new mathematics teacher, but you can call me Al."

'If 'x' is unknown, why should I rock the boat?'

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

'My name is Jeremy and I approved this message.'