Aquarium Supporter Gifts

"This party sucks! I thought there were going to be swimmers!"

Horror movies

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

Piranhaclaus

"They communicate through clicks and taps."

Fish that snore, and the tragic lives of those who care.

"...so it appears we were talking to his butt that entire time."

"I have to refill it everyday. He has a tendency to retain water."

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

Pets.

"Look, children are just pathetic substitutes for people who can't have pets."

"I don't do windows."

"I think it loves us."

"Larry, nooo! Don't look into the BOWL!!!"

"Just water for me, please."

"Well, this isn't really going anywhere if you don't like public displays of affection."

"Take your first left and then keep turning left until you eventually float to the top."

"I'd love to help out but I'm barely keeping my head below water now."

"Guide to physical comedy fish"

Fishbowl rebellion.

"It's a recipe called no-cook fish chowder."

'I wish I was creative'

"Please, Al. You know the backstroke scares the children."

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

'Too bad we're not pay-per-view.'

'I can't find a dry martini anywhere.'

'So what have you been up to?'

I read on Candorville.com that was rank 29,705th in the world when it comes to attention spans. What? Aren't there only 196 countries? The article didn't just include human countries. It included the various animal kingdoms and the plant republics. Did you know that Americans have an eight-second attention span ... but the goldfish who live in little Lionel Brown's aquarium kingdom at 1492 MLK Way in Candorville have a nine-second attention span? Are you sure you weren't reading a humor column?

"I wish someone would come and turn the vibrating buzzer off on that mobile phone!"

"What are you talking about? We don’t even have a toilet seat!"

'I'm tired of this bread and water diet.'

Bottle-nosed Dolphins.

'As I grow older and I reflect back on it, I'm kind of sorry we ate all the kids!'

"I'll give you a big wet kiss.. "