Appliance Adventures Gifts

The Adventures of Break-O-Man

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

"Al, you've been chosen Businessman of the Year by the Junior Chamber of Commerce."

"We're gonna entertain you for exactly the next 30 minutes."

"Do you want to suddenly decide we need a waffle maker?"

'Does this thing get channel four.'

"It's time you took a vacation, John. I said to 'marinate'... not 'palpate' the liver!"

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

'And a special feature on this model is the diet ice cubes.'

"Wow! The big guy! And what kind of B.T.U.s am I looking at here?"

Oil Spill: 'Oh dear! That was the last of our extra virgin.'

Linda discovers she had just baked the wrong ziti

"This new dough-maker attachment is going to pay for itself in no time.'

Entertainment systems

"My compliments to the can opener."

'With all these mega mergers between electronics and telecommunications firms, I just got an obscene email from the toaster...'

Microwave. Do you have any idea of the time pressure I'm under?

'You made me jump,'

"To toast!"

"Does it come with magnets?"

"This is our high-traffic, reinforced, heavy-duty model."

"I was supposed to rinse them first? So, you're telling me somebody designed a machine to wash dishes, but we're supposed to make sure we wash the dishes before we put them in the machine?"

Bread maker, coffee maker, tea maker, pasta maker.

Castle drawbridge opens to reveal a dishwasher

Lunch-Hour Highlights

"That is why you don't put 'instant rice' in a slow cooker."

Tonight's Lecture: Earth's Biodiversity at Risk. Obviously, they've never looked inside my refrigerator.

"Unfortunately, our user-friendly toaster is warranty-unfriendly!"

How the cords get all tangles up when you're away.

When it came to appliance repairs...Joe wasn't one to mince his words!

All the other land having been claimed and fenced already, Jedidiah bought his own range from the big box store.