Apology Master Gifts

'Can we please just forget everything I said. It was the office party, I'd had a few drinks...I didn't know what I was saying!'

Priest's 'To do' list.

"I know I haven't been much of a master to you, but then again you haven't been much of a pet to me."

'A dog ate my homework.'

'You got anything that says I put some thought into this gift?'

"What do you mean?! That apology is the best piece of fiction I've ever written!"

'What's the best kind of glue to fix a TV screen?'

Colin could see that his competitor had obviously done his market research.

Child writes letter to Santa reading 'Sorry Santa, I DO want to go to school'.

"Gee, I'm awfully sorry!"

Sorry

"I can't mow the lawn today. A bug just flew up my nose."

Man looking at greeting cards labeled "Apologies for not writing sooner" with sub-headings for different lengths of time.

"OK, what have you done?"

Hyacinths

"This is to apologise for the delay in internal mail that you wrote to us about in 1997"

"Better get two dozen. She won't be able to hit you as hard with both arms full."

"I'd like to get something for my wife. Do you have any olive branches?"

Dog ride on dump truck and dispose of homework.

Very sorry

"Stop moaning. I said I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry I called you boring."

Greeting Cards

"Sorry I'm late, I've brought cappuccinos for everyone."

"Your basic rule of thumb should be,the bigger the guilt, the longer the stem."

'Next time you apologize, try to do it with no strings attached. String can be very distracting.'

Remorse code

Man looks for wife help from machine.

"I'm still waiting for an apology!"

'The Pope has decided to issue another apology for not issuing an apology.'

Feeling guilty? Florest

'I'm trying to make restitution for shredding the sofa.'

'Would you believe, humble pie?'

'No dear, I do not think it's time we homo sapiens apologised to the Neanderthals.'

'Let's pretend we're married so we can have a fight!'