Antique Hunting Gifts

Reality of the Antique Roadshow: 'I bought it at a garage sale for $10.' 'Ha! You really got ripped off!'

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

Southwark Fair.

Second hand furniture.

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

'They look more up to date than the ones in your tool-box.'

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

Abandoning the computer for a typewriter.

Sundial Time

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

'...then Johannes Gutenberg built the first bookcase'

"The previous tenant was a bit of a shut-in."

Fossil record player.

That's supposed to say garage sale!

'This seems like a good time to get rid of some of the king's junk.'

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

A hammer in his den enjoying a cigar and port with his collection of trophy thumbs above his head.

You had me at vintage.

"There's more inside."

'This is a wind-up, isn't it?'

Antiques

'No, you can't just watch the end of Bargainhunt!'

'I'd like to match this credenza.'

"Midtown Vinyl. Vintage albums + EPs. Midtown Ink. Vintage books + newspapers."

The First Printed Bible

"Attention, everyone! I'd like to introduce the newest member of our family."

'We always like to give more bling for the buck.'

'This book is so rare it's never been published.'

Clock and Watch Shop: Second-Hand Clocks and Minute-Hand Clocks.

Ye Old Cafe: No Coffee Today - Sore Arm!

'Who are you kidding? This is a wind-up isn't it!'

"They lead a simple life - they don't even put gas in their cars."

A mummy, in police tape, chases a police officer.

'Have you any idea just how little this is worth?'

'My old Nehru suit! And in a pocket there's still a bottle of aftershave lotion from the glove box of my '55 Nash Rambler.'