Animal Kingdom Dramatists Gifts

Judgement

A crowd of happy pet owners.

A kangeroo and it's baby read books about understanding each other.

"It says here that humans are the only member of the animal kingdom who can have sex any time, any place."

Well... Tis the season to be jolly!

Shakespeare's Lost Play: The Taming of the Pooch.

Thug life on safari.

"Sorry - He's changed His mind again. Stripes on the zebra, spots on the giraffe, no stars on the lion and make the elephant bigger and the amoebae smaller."

Dog Looks Alarmed At The Vets.

'My dentist recommended it.'

Drama Llama

'Go and hunt for your own lunch. Who do you think I am, Ray Mears?!'

"Well it looks like we're all here."

I can read this audit, but HOW should I read it...What is my MOTIVATION, how do I bring these figures to life,make them sing!... Colin often wondered whether accountancy had been the right career choice for him

Food chain.

'I've gone from King of the Jungle to team leader.'

"What should I say this is about?"

And make sure my daughter is back by 10pm: You really don't want to see me angry!

"It's a profit and loss statement. Read it with gusto!"

'Nice going, Mom.You ate my entire insect collection. Now I'll fail biology class at school.'

'Sorry, I've been head-hunted by another pride.'

"The global warming thing is beginning to scare me!"

"Wait till you hear this one! This little fella is calling himself a mammal and he reckons one day they're going to dominate the Earth!"

"Boy, I have such a bad hangover! The guy I stung last night was drunk..."

'Wow, a weird animal without a mouth.'

Spawning did nothing for Maurice and Kevin.

"No way I'm going to curtsy! This "King of the Jungle" business has really gone to your head, hasn't it?!"

'I'm a good ape, but I've never really been a great ape.'

'Isn't it enough to have long hair?'

'I'm tellin' you, Maurice, you should try it. I feel younger, more confident and just yesterday I caught a coupla gibbons checkin' me out.'

Zebra to lion: 'You're going to have to stop stalking me. However, you can follow me on Twitter.'

Only a few experts know that antelopes can be very chauvinistic.

'Hey, nice gun! What do you hunt with it?'

I assume obedience class was a washout then.

"Pulling out the thorn was easy. What I'm most proud of is the hair transplant."