Animal Humor Fan Gifts

"You've been out partying all night, again, haven't you?"

'What happend? I thought you went to the dentist for a cleaning.'

'You're what we call 'high risk'.'

'Wendell, I'm home! How's that sore throat, sweetie? Feeling better?'

'Yeah, yeah, I know what chocolate does to dogs. Just tell me how to spell, 'From your secret admirer'.'

'Okay class, is there anyone else who does not understand the term foreshadowing?'

'This is one sick dog.'

'We are communicating better, but we are still not out of the woods.'

'I had to stop Yoga and Meditation: I was getting less and less aggressive...'

'Say, did you know that we actually only use a very small portion of our brain?'

"Still studying foreign languages?" "Moo?"

'The next time you get captured by rabbits, you can pay your own ransom!'

In the course of the evolution, Boa Constrictors found new hunting strategies.

"Stay cute, it's the only trick you'll ever need."

'You're not just a polar bear - you're a bi-polar bear.'

"He was born breech."

"I think your bluffing!"

"I would not be opposed to a cat tax."

Jeff's new computer came with the wrong kind of ram.

Damn the Dam

'Whoa! All the blood rushed to my feet.'

"And now we just relax, settle down, and smother them until they crack."

"I'm totally bipartisan. I eat as many birds as I do mice."

(Hey! Great chops!)

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

Another Time Travel Pair o' Ducks.

'Right. Like I'd tell YOU.'

'So you're saying you don't remember anything.'

'It can work: If you wake up early and I go to bed late, we'll have time to play...'

Cats celebrating birthday, cake is shaped like mouse

'Of course they look like ants. These are ant hills.'

'My horoscope says I'm going to meet a bearded horny stranger.'

'I'm sure you would be very good at it but we don't take geese.'

Penguins say to white bird: 'Sorry, formal only.'

"I love it!"