Animal Control Officers T-Shirts

"Diplomatic immunity, dammit, diplomatic immunity!"

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

Collies Without Borders

'When you get up on the stand be sure to keep your answers short. A whole lot of barking will only frighten the jury.'

Europe and immigration.

'Technically, he's on a leash, so I say we let this one go.'

"I'm interested in working with animals and deliveries."

'Let's skip Mr. Arnold's house. He's the dog catcher.'

'There! Now he's tied to my satisfaction and ready for surgery!'

Viva Belarus!

"What if the cat stuck in the tree has a gun? Is that an emergency?"

I think I know where the noises in your wall are coming from. Pest control.

'I got 397 dead birds and the mayor breathing down my neck. So, is this our perp or just another copycat?'

'That's right - a restraining order. You should know mother bears are very protective of their young.'

'...Do not feed the bears'

'Rex! Have you been counting the sheep again?'

A dog catcher catching a dog catching a cat catching a bird catching a fly.

'Noah, before you leave we'd like to have a word with you!'

'Accept it, boss. He makes all the dog-catchers drive him home.'

'Honest, officer -- I thought they were hippies!'

"First the artillery softens them up. Then the armored division moves in, followed by the infantry. And remember: we're dealing with hardened asylum seekers."

Dog joins another to run after a ball.

Belarus lets immigrants into Europe

Dog Catcher.

"How does it feel to be a fink, Sparky?"

Rancher builds fence around angry bull.

A recurring crisis at the Farkinski farm

Raccoons! Single file into the crate! Snake! Back in your hole! Crickets! Keep it down! Animal Control Freak.

Fight against theft of endangered species

'Yes, it is last year's hunting license, but I'm only hunting the ones I missed last year.'

"Sales rep from Milton Keynes? You prove he no British spymaster who sent you on secret mission to Bananastan?"

Dogs Home: Beware of the Human

"Using a female in hear helps to round up stray dogs!"