Animal Border Control Officer T-Shirts

Collies Without Borders

Schengen

UK border controls relaxed.

'When you get up on the stand be sure to keep your answers short. A whole lot of barking will only frighten the jury.'

Europe and immigration.

'Technically, he's on a leash, so I say we let this one go.'

Crossing the Nachos Grande

"What if the cat stuck in the tree has a gun? Is that an emergency?"

'Let's skip Mr. Arnold's house. He's the dog catcher.'

"Don't worry. If we're too late, we can always catch the secondary screening."

Viva Belarus!

'I got 397 dead birds and the mayor breathing down my neck. So, is this our perp or just another copycat?'

A dog catcher catching a dog catching a cat catching a bird catching a fly.

'Accept it, boss. He makes all the dog-catchers drive him home.'

"First the artillery softens them up. Then the armored division moves in, followed by the infantry. And remember: we're dealing with hardened asylum seekers."

Belarus lets immigrants into Europe

Man guarding a written border.

"It's marzipan pigs."

Dog joins another to run after a ball.

Frontex

Immigration freedom

"How does it feel to be a fink, Sparky?"

"Using a female in hear helps to round up stray dogs!"

Dog Catcher.

'I don't smell any drugs, just Old Spice, geezer aftershave.'

"Sales rep from Milton Keynes? You prove he no British spymaster who sent you on secret mission to Bananastan?"

Dogs Home: Beware of the Human

"Yeah, but it doesn't smell like a bomb!"

Border Collie

'I was expecting something a little more imposing.'

UK Home Office - Workers in the inhospitality sector.

US Border Controls

"You're the school yard monitor today. It's your duty to eject the bear from school grounds."