Animal Comedy Lovers Gifts

"Don’t look at me. You’re the one who brought him the newspaper."

'Call me 'dear' one more time and I'm yanking those antlers out by the roots'

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

'Yeah, I'm sorry to break it to you bud, that eating grass thing is a myth!'

"Ok, let's get those knuckles up off the ground, arms way up high now, feet wide apart. . ."

"Better start moving towards shelter: the weather forecast is for rain this afternoon..."

'Simple - it's your high-protein diet that keeps you so manic.'

'Knuth! How many times did I tell you not to play with the food??!!'

"Hurry up, I'm hungry."

"His mother was a poodle and his father was a shoe."

'We call these supernumerary teats!'

Dog traps the postman.

'Are you the genius who came up with the 'Alternative Payment' program?'

-'Okay Rebel, find the drugs.' -'Are you kidding? There's dirty underwear here!'

'Leap frog? No thanks- I'm a toad.'

When Dogs Rule

You dope! Why would you build our home right next to a power plant?

Cow in a vest: Well, I think I look like Bruce Willis!

'Scary movie?'

"I'll tell you how much wood I could chuck if I could—a lot, like, half a cord!"

"I'm not kidding: I am feline too and I do love swimming!"

I loved Venice: So many statues to perch upon and people to feed you...

"Ok, maybe this isn't happening."

"He ran out of pee."

"Fuhgettaboutit, Charley. Ya been fixed."

"We've done it Agnes. We're living the dream."

'My mother was a real bitch!'

"I'm not concerned about us as long as there is nothing in the stimulus package for cats."

'Your loyalty to the company is exemplary, Potter, but we'll have to let you go if you can't stop chewing up the conference room furniture!'

Hog Futures

'Hang on. Let's not get ahead of ourselves. Apparently that's not a good idea.'

Dog imagines its master as a meat chart.

'I refuse to believe that Winkie was a terrorist.'

Pavlov's Dog, Ph.D.