Animal Comedy Enthusiast Gifts

A dog locks a man out and sleeps in his bed.

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

Faster, Georges, faster!

The Rooster Comedian.

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

'Oh for heaven's sake, you're a cow. Just eat grass and be happy.'

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

"Author does not do tricks."

"Ok, let's get those knuckles up off the ground, arms way up high now, feet wide apart. . ."

The only time cats are known to laugh.

"Say, when did you get so fluff?"

'Yeah, I'm sorry to break it to you bud, that eating grass thing is a myth!'

The americanisation of vulture.

'Oh Hi!'

Cow talking to dog: 'What...You eat your own...?!'

"Mmmm! Bears hibernate in the winter. Cats can hibernate anytime we want!"

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

'The Buck Stops Here.'

Dog fetching clown shoes.

'There's nothing wrong with your heart. It's your soft chocolate center.'

Next year, we are NOT going to Costco.

"Excuse me ma'am, may I help you cross the road so that I can get the answer to this dumb joke my friend keeps telling?"

"I can't decide who gets the promotion, so we'll settle it with a rope toy Tug O' War."

Bases loaded, no outs. And coach once again turns to his trusty golden reliever.

Great moments in art dogs playing poker, cats playing Pictionary,

'Simple - it's your high-protein diet that keeps you so manic.'

'Oh don't worry, we had him defanged.'

'After years of practicing in empty theaters, Horace's dream of becoming a soft-shoe dancer seemed as remote as ever.'

Where Shaving Cream Comes From

'Now that you've moved in and unpacked, Higgins, we'd like you to start thinking outside of the box.'

Penguin

Cat mistakes bars for toilets.

'Ha ha! No kidding! You're pretty much most people's worst enemy.'

"This isn't helping my migraine."