Animal Chatter Fan Gifts

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

"Happy St Patrick’s Day"

Head over Hooves

Wolf Karaoke

"As I was only saying the other day..."

"He also barks, meows and makes noises like a hamster."

Three lanes of traffic with the first two lanes crowded with turtles. The third lane (to the left) a couple rabbits speeding along without any traffic. An easy pass sign has carrots replacing dollars.

'Rabbits make great pets, but it's best to have them one at a time.'

"I'm fascinated by body language."

Bessy had won the 100m sprint... but many suspected Steeroid abuse!

"It was the most relaxing massage I've ever had."

"No need for stage fright, it's just a documentary crew: be yourself..."

"Stop squawking. Use your words."

'This is a real barnburner.'

"I think they may have rumbled me, Sarge."

"I'm your Furry Godmother."

"Have you mistakenly put dog food in the bird feeder?"

"What kind of tomorrow is it? — I don't know, when I wake up, it's already today."

"We're giving you our complete cooperation. There's no need to bark at us!"

'You look quite distinguished with that gray hare on your head, Jim!'

Boarway Show

"This maze hasn't been much fun since the tourists found it."

'We should talk more.'

"I'll just have a small salad. . . say 400 pounds of fresh river vegetation."

'I know it's not around too much this season but I think I have swine flu!'

"Gesundtheit, Dear."

'Here comes another swarm - it must be that time of year again.'

"I wish you'd stop obsessively checking your feed!"

-Psst! Back me in the 4:30! -Oh! -Surprised I can talk, huh? -No, surprised you think you can win!

"Now why would a seagull fly in here and try to establish a rapport with me?"

"I didn't get the job: apparently, burying your head in the sand is not a good project management strategy..."

'Charlotte's web-cam'

Pop goes the weasel.

'I've still got nothing. I'm going to call an electrician.'