Angelic Parody Fan Gifts

'Well if it isn't Bert Higgins! I thought you were dead!'

Mr. and Mrs. Angel

"It's your final warning...Quit playing the 'Beverly Hillbillies' theme song"

"At the time I thought it was a goose."

Paradise FC: The Blessed Y The Rest.

"God may have forgiven you, but Hoskins, Danner & Smythe, LLC, have not."

"It's true. God appeared to Trump in a dream and told him to run for president."

'I would have been here sooner, if not for a wonderful, caring, competent doctor.'

'One nice thing about this, it has overcome my fear of height.'

'How nice! -- They're making a ten-part miniseries about the Bible!'

"The only problem with Heaven is there's nowhere to hang stuff."

'I‘ll be relieved when they invent the aeroplane, these long trips are playing havoc with my wings'.

Heaven Has VIP

"Yup. This is heaven. Free beer and unlimited peanuts."

"I couldn't take it with me, so I came back."

St Peter at gates of Heaven tells thuggish looking man: 'You're in the wrong place, alright. Let me guess: sat nav?'

"Don't feed them! It makes them dependent."

"Care to try the dip? It's posthummus."

"Look, I know you think you've got the stuff, but I'm telling you: walk God."

'Thank you for calling the Pearly Gates.. your prayers are important to us and may be monitored for training purposes.'

"Nope, wrong password. You've got two more tries..."

"You received your rewards on earth."

'Oh, sure-- we're immortal SO FAR.'

"Oh, come on, you must want to be remembered for something!"

"Looks like you have Heaven Basic."

"Ah...a newcomer to Heaven, I see."

"I have eternal life? Does that mean I can cancel my life insurance policy?"

"Kids today!"

"Sh*t!... I only died to get away from advertising..."

'I was an overachiever.'