Angelic Humor Fan Gifts

Surprise at the Pearly Gates.

Inventive Uses of Halo

"Whoa! You didn't give the little thank you wave in traffic even once?!"

"Oh, come on, you must want to be remembered for something!"

"He's from Texas."

"Which way to Hog Heaven?"

'Sorry you can't come in. You're Boring.'

"The only problem with Heaven is there's nowhere to hang stuff."

'The last thing I heard was 'Nonsense, Piranhas look way different!''

'You're being deported. We just found out you worked for the IRS!'

'Could you be a little more specific than angel food?'

'I‘ll be relieved when they invent the aeroplane, these long trips are playing havoc with my wings'.

'Hello, God? Tony here... Fine, thanks. SIr, it's that Hayes guy. He's cheating again. You want I should whack him?'

'I miss partisan politics.'

I agree it's kind of sad...but it was just a matter of time.

"You're kidding! You count S.A.T.s?"

Mr. and Mrs. Angel

An amplified harp

'I didn't expect to have remote controls here.'

"It's your final warning...Quit playing the 'Beverly Hillbillies' theme song"

"At the time I thought it was a goose."

'I would have been here sooner, if not for a wonderful, caring, competent doctor.'

'How nice! -- They're making a ten-part miniseries about the Bible!'

'One nice thing about this, it has overcome my fear of height.'

"So much for eternal rest."

"But you're paper trained and we don't have any newspapers or newspaper people."

"Say what you like about Hell, at least they have solid floors."

'Let's see...yes, there is a wing upgrade for a soul patch.'

Late Night TV

"But don't bother making up a schedule for all those projects. I've got all the time in the world now."

Heaven Has VIP

'Gee, I never expected to find this problem here too!'

St Peter at gates of Heaven tells thuggish looking man: 'You're in the wrong place, alright. Let me guess: sat nav?'

"Yup. This is heaven. Free beer and unlimited peanuts."

'Oh, sure-- we're immortal SO FAR.'