Anecdotes Gifts

"First, I sent a rocket of a drive down the fairway, then I took the 7-iron, put that ball on the green...a hundred and eighty yards if it was an inch..."

Ask Sadie! I just read an article where Daisy Ridley said J.J. Abrams wrote drafts for Episode VIII and Episode IX. And then Rian Johnson THREW THAT OUT and went a whole different direction. This makes me lose all faith in Star Wars. Am I overreacting? **Actual reader question. Excellent question. This reminds me of the time I saw Gone with the Wind on opening day. I was the invited guest of an elderly veteran of the Civil War. He couldn't stop yammering about how seceding from the union didn't

'I'd like now to introduce Len who will tell slightly humourous stories in his inimicable self-serving way,'

'The next piece contains sex, violence, and Homeric epithets.'

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

'Caesar salad?'

Hot cross buns

'Silly me. I thought his 'Catch and Release' bumper sticker referred to his philosophy on trout fishing.'

"I don't mind emotional trauma if I can turn it into a really funny anecdote."

"My great-uncle Octavio always wore his hat in the house. That way, if bad company knocked on the door, he could say he was just leaving."

"I've been window-shopping..."

"At first I thought it was just coincidence, then I noticed it corresponded perfectly to your shift."

Newton discovers surrealism

"Now that you mention it, I think that I too may have a Master's in Education."

Margaret Cavendish

Barry Cryer.

Lore and legend of the Pennypackers

Paddlithic Period

"Without the drone we wouldn't have made it on time!"

"We never have any activities that make for cute anecdotes anymore."

"I am reminded of a morbidly depressing anecdote. . ."

'Ferguson's not at his desk -- He must be sleepwalking again!'

Anecdote Magazine

"Ha, ha, wait … so Cheryl from accounting, ha, ha, ha, is your, ha, ha, wife?!!"

'When I was your age we had to carry our water from the spring in a bucket...and then we'd get it out with a dipper!'

"I just invented this. I call it "freezer bag"."

Napkin Writer

Queen Ranavola of Madagascar executed any of her subjects who appeared in her dreams....

'Okay, but don't try to operate it until I invent insurance.'

"Lassie is merely billed as America's best-loved dog."

'I couldn't get the cap off the prescription bottle. What did you die of?'

Ramblers Association

"We'd like to go somewhere that will provide us with a rich source of after dinner anecdotes!"

Sooner or Later

"There's Colonel Clapworthy alone with his memories - dirty old devil!"