Ancient Philosopher Fanatic Gifts

Diogenes the Tourist Attraction

Caveman's dog with head outside car window.

"So, what did you do at charter school today?"

"I hate it when the damned things decide they need to get out and burn off some calories."

"Messenger, dost thou bring me good news or dost thou bring me bad news?"

Disraeli Stands for 'British Interests' Against Russian Expansionism

"Here's the parking lot."

"Is 'family' friend of foe?"

"When will I be old enough to have an inner child?"

'Bugger!'

Prehistoric Peeps: Even the 'Derby' had its primeval counterpart.

'Oi! Man is not a political animal in here!'

"I may have wasted my life, but at least I don't look stupid."

'This is gluten free, isn't it?'

The first microscope capable of seeing the number of angels dancing on the head of a pin.

"Really! A firecracker! Test his nerves! Where do you come up with these stupid ideas?"

"The issues are a big snore, Dave. Let's talk about my hair on fire."

"You should've seen the triceratops that got away. It had to be this...um...this...uh...well, it was huge."

Lazy man contemplates the moment of creation.

'Honey! I'm cave!' (a caveman arrives home)

Digital TV presents "It's true there really is a channel for everyone"

Teacher of the Year: "Accepting for Susan Curtis is her clinical psychologist."

Otto von Bismarck

Some moss pounces on a rolling stone.

'Tsk...woolly thinking again.'

Super-ego Surveillance

"Is there a God?"

"When I grow up, I want to impeach a president."

Socrates, 399 B.C: 'Wow, I could have had a V-8.'

Psychologist Birthdays

'We think, therefore we are a tank.'

"Nothing like a good stretch before looting and burning."

Extreme Sheepherding

'I'm going out to forge an alliance.'

"I'm sorry. How did I know what he would do to your cat if I let him play with it?"