Ancient Empire Admirer Gifts

Archimedes statue with a lever

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

Hadrian's Wall

'This will be great for chase scenes.'

Neptune

'I like it but frankly, I had something more substantial in mind.'

"No - you’re right. It’s dumb."

Egyptian Football

Troys'R'Us.

'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'

Caveman invents an armchair and his dog sits in it.

'Gee, I just never get tired of this!'

'Oi! Man is not a political animal in here!'

In udder de Nile

The Day When The Curse Of The Mummy Lost It's Horror. . .

"Agreed. They were undoubtedly sack religious."

"Well, Professor, it translates to, 'I don’t want to work, I just want to bang on the drum all day.'"

Romulus and Remus

"Trust me to get the awkward one...!"

"Sure, but what have you invented lately?"

"I dropped my goblet!"

Museum.

A Real Pinata Surprise

"Plagues are old-school – we're going to hit you with sanctions."

"You guys need to #@%!% fight harder. You're all #@%!% wimps! You call yourselves a #@%!% army? Bull%#!*!"

Fish to friend regarding third fish leaving Precambrian ocean: 'There's been no living with him since he started to evolve.'

'Two, four, six, eight Who do we appreciate ,,,'

"I can't decide whether to call it 'wheel' or 'emoji'."

Scary things in the museum

The Venus de Milo after vandals put a prosthetic arm on her.

Greek and Roman Art: The Broken Off Bits