Ancient Egypt Lover Gifts

Pyramid Graffiti

Sphinx with a Satellite Dish

'Just follow these simple instructions.'

"What the...They wrapped me in toilet paper!"

"What does it mean? Heck, I don't know! It's mystifying!"

'I hope you like this, dear. I got the recipe from Gordon Ramses, latest cookery hieroglyphics.'

"Have your people call my people."

'Ugh, I hate food with preservatives.'

Curse or not, Dave had to pass this exam.

The Birth of the Pyramid Marketing Sales Scam (circa 4,000 BC)

Take a break, Archimedes. A nice soak in the bath will work wonders.

'Thank goodness next week we'll be in a new dynasty and we can make some other style of pottery.'

Mummy Busks For Coins For His Cases

In udder de Nile

'Do you know what's worse than being a mummy? Being a mummy with a prostate!'

'Oh great, now I have to render unto Caesar, too.'

"Noah, what do you think are the most dangerous animals you've brought abroad the ark?"

'So, Pharaoh, what sort of collateral do you have to put down on this $2 billion Great Pyramid you want to build?'

The Day When The Curse Of The Mummy Lost It's Horror. . .

'- and what makes you think they must have been TALL?'

How to create a password you can remember...

'I know what you're thinking.'

'I know it's only a dummy run...but I'm telling you there's no wi fi signal in the tomb.'

"I hope you realize your late arrivals for work seriously upset the museum's visitors!"

Orpheus and Eurydice

'The spheres keep rolling away, Your Majesty -- how about we just build a pyramid?'

'Mummy' clocking into to work

'The spheres keep rolling away, Your Majesty -- how about we just build a pyramid?'

"Just so you know, I'm taking all this with me into the afterlife."

"We're pretty sure it's the West Nile Virus."

Romulus (left) and Remus

"Could you explain this 2500 year gap in your resume?"

Mummy Toilet Roll.

The Lesser Pyramids

"What's a two-dimensional picture for 'rhymes with blinks?'"