Ancient Egypt Lover Pillows

Pyramid Graffiti

Sphinx with a Satellite Dish

'Just follow these simple instructions.'

"What the...They wrapped me in toilet paper!"

'I hope you like this, dear. I got the recipe from Gordon Ramses, latest cookery hieroglyphics.'

"What does it mean? Heck, I don't know! It's mystifying!"

"Have your people call my people."

The Birth of the Pyramid Marketing Sales Scam (circa 4,000 BC)

'Ugh, I hate food with preservatives.'

Curse or not, Dave had to pass this exam.

Take a break, Archimedes. A nice soak in the bath will work wonders.

Messenger of the gods in the digital age.

'Thank goodness next week we'll be in a new dynasty and we can make some other style of pottery.'

Mummy Busks For Coins For His Cases

'Do you know what's worse than being a mummy? Being a mummy with a prostate!'

The Day When The Curse Of The Mummy Lost It's Horror. . .

'- and what makes you think they must have been TALL?'

"Noah, what do you think are the most dangerous animals you've brought abroad the ark?"

'Oh great, now I have to render unto Caesar, too.'

'So, Pharaoh, what sort of collateral do you have to put down on this $2 billion Great Pyramid you want to build?'

In udder de Nile

How to create a password you can remember...

'I know what you're thinking.'

'I know it's only a dummy run...but I'm telling you there's no wi fi signal in the tomb.'

'The spheres keep rolling away, Your Majesty -- how about we just build a pyramid?'

'Mummy' clocking into to work

'The spheres keep rolling away, Your Majesty -- how about we just build a pyramid?'

"I hope you realize your late arrivals for work seriously upset the museum's visitors!"

Orpheus and Eurydice

"Just so you know, I'm taking all this with me into the afterlife."

"We're pretty sure it's the West Nile Virus."

Romulus (left) and Remus

"Could you explain this 2500 year gap in your resume?"

Mummy Toilet Roll.

'Sorry, but I'll have to call back...I'm all wrapped up at the moment.'