Ancient Egypt Buff Gifts

Pyramid Garden

Tourists

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

'Just follow these simple instructions.'

"What the...They wrapped me in toilet paper!"

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

'I'm sure he was a great guy, but there's a new Pharaoh in town.'

'I hope you like this, dear. I got the recipe from Gordon Ramses, latest cookery hieroglyphics.'

A child at a museum starts to pull the wrappings off a mummy.

There were originally four musketeers. He said that the pen is mightier than the sword.

"Where do you think we are in the food chain right now?"

The Fall of Gnome

'I think it's more than a coincidence that I discover fire, and my wife discovers burnt food on the same day.'

A watch face with Stonehenge

"When I said make it RIGHT, I meant correctly."

'Sometimes I wish we'd never told him he was adopted.'

"No, this is NOT a beta-test!"

Humanities 101. I hear you're reading Greek plays in there. Yeah, it's a real Medea blitz!

"Tonight we are going out to plunder, lads!"

Maybe the gods aren't angry. Maybe the gods are just yanking our chain.

Pyramid catflap...

Sphinx Comes Alive

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

"Have your people call my people."

'Why is it always me that has to put the cat out?'

The Birth of the Pyramid Marketing Sales Scam (circa 4,000 BC)

Curse or not, Dave had to pass this exam.

"At lease we managed to stop the leak before the water reached 'E' Deck."

The Tutankhamen Expedition 1908 (The Economy Version).

Litter Tray Stonehenge

"...it was believed that anyone who displeased it would meet with a terrible fate, which of course is complete nonsen..."

"Stanley, this is a historic moment. We've discovered the world's longest kiss. Guinness Book of Records here we come!"

'Ugh, I hate food with preservatives.'

Mummy Busks For Coins For His Cases