Ancestor Hunter Pillows

"And this entire section is the obit of a very thorough genealogist."

The Kitchen area of a Whitechapel Boarding House

"Could you tell me how to get to cedar grove, New Jersey? I want to see where my grandfather was born."

'I've just discovered that one of my ancestors was a Security Goose for the Roman Army...'

"There's more inside."

'Aloha! On behalf of the tourist board may I thank you for visiting our remote and mysterious island - Have a nice day!'

'I never saw a tracer bullet that I didn't admire for color, clarity and swiftness.'

"Your old Jewish mother with some pickled herring, sir. To remind you of your roots,"

'I'm tracing my relatives.'

"The good news is that you inherit Mr. Brumble's entire estate, Miss Finster. The bad news is that he owes an outstanding balance to your plastic surgeon!"

Alvin, genealogist extraordinaire, traces his roots back to the first amoeba.

'Dad, have you ever thought about researching our family tree?'

When you said you were going to find your ancestors I thought you meant on the INTERNET!

"Can DNA testing really prove that George Washington was the 'Father if our Country'?"

'I went online to check out my ancestry and I found that my dad, 10,000 times removed, was an amoeba!'

"Hi everyone, thanks for channeling in to help me with my ancestry project."

Man: 'My family tree is infested with termites.'

"It belonged to my great... great creepy Uncle Edgar."

"Pop, what part of ‘rest in peace’ don’t you understand?!"

"Mum, just curious: when you did the family tree, did you research all the way back to our ancestors on Noah's ark?"

"Good news, Mr. Vanderfirth. We've traced your lineage back to a woman who lived in East Africa two hundred thousand years ago."

Antique oriental carpets.

Dave's most treasured possession was the picture he had of his great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandfather.

'You rejected my great grandfather and my father. I demand you recuse yourself!'

After spending months researching his family tree, Mr Henshaw could think of little else.

"Your DNA test came back – you're 49% from the Amazon, 49% from the Caribbean, and 2% from some plastics plant in Texas."

"Albert Morris? But I've spent the last six months researching Alberta Morris?!"

'I've traced out family tree back to some lizards in the Mesozoic era.'

Sir Rupert Murgatroyd

'That's the evening paper, sir.'

'Last year Frank tried tracing back his roots but came back empty!'

"I traced my family tree. This is it."

"Don't bother wasting your money on DNA testing. The results all come back, 'Ape.'"