Amused By Contradictions Gifts

Plant rose trees in a sunny part of the garden.

"To be honest, I don't believe in ghosts."

"This is a side of Manhattan you don't often see."

"This just in: one of us always tells lies; the other always tells the truth. Who's who? Stay tuned."

Clancy Strip: Money and Beer

Japanese woman in minimalist house reads 'How to Clutter Your Life'

'Massive unpredictability is absolutely certain, maybe.'

"No aliens"

Snowman dreaming of surfing.

"Just junk mail."

'I will only need to talk to you in order to contradict what you've said.'

'But what if you're a masochist...?'

"Graph A is verified by Graph B. Graph B is verified by Graph C. Graph C is verified by Graph A. So you see...it's all verified."

A monk watches TV in his zen garden.

Woman sunbathing on snowy balcony under sunlamp.

Turtle chick.

You can't go back.

Zorro does algebra.

'I want a 'green' car colored red that keeps me in the black.'

Zeno Gives Directions

'Rodney, I don't know what to make of you. You're bored by excitement, and excited by boredom.'

Clancy: Good Idea

Worker is confused at the Paradox Parcel Company.

'Have you read about the millionaire who dresses like a hobo and gives money to those who are kind to him?'

"Let's face it: Life can be life threatening."

'That dog won't hunt.' Bird dog in a pink tutu.

"You not only have multiple personalities, but worse - They have a clashing sense of style."

'Traitor! I hate you!'

A Salesperson's Dilemma

"I feel an intense pride, Robert, that I live in a country rich enough to have war and peace at the same time."

Erractic Review

'No thanks, I'm trying to cut down on meat products.'

"How can it be an 'Act of God'? Your policy states you're an atheist."

'We'll get by with some money I've saved, my part time job, and my payments as an F.B.I. informer...'