Alternative Medicine Explorers Gifts

The Chiropractor - 'I've been looking forward to this all week!'

'He's the star of a new medical series.'

Pinocchio Acupuncture.

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

Self help acupuncture

'With these alternative fertility treatments you never quite know how things turn out,'

Jesus's First and Less-Heralded Miracle Walk,

"All I take anymore is mushrooms for my anxiety, ketamine for my depression, and ibuprofen for the goblins constantly eating my feet."

"I thought I'd give Western medicine one more chance."

We at pharmacorp are 100% behind the benefits of spiritual and artistic therapies which is why we've developed 'megazymol' to enhance the experience!

'Take two of these, and call me in the morning!'

"CBD… oil… CBD… oil…"

Alternative Medicine.

Man to other coming out of Alternative Health Club: 'I had total joint replacement - they switched me from hemp to medical marijuana.'

"Aren't you getting a little carried away with this herbal medicine, Doctor?"

"Okay, Jaxcsunn, stay still in the crystal circle while I douse you in essential oils."

Flo figured that since she was using medical marijuana during chemo, she might as well go hippy retro.

'I've got an appointment with Mr. Payne.' - 'He'll see you now.' - 'Okay, take a deep br-' - 'Gah!' - 'Great, now turn ov-' - 'Argh!' - 'And a final tw-' - 'Mummy!' - '*Sob*' - 'Okay, all done.' - 'Did you, by any chance...' - '...hear you crying...'

'I can't wait for a generic version of eyes of newts to come out.'

"My joints... are almost done"

"Lately my joints are stiff." "You're rollin' 'em too tight. Try vaping."

Man passes Holistic Health Clinic and sees Holistic Donuts.

'We can do extensive blood work, take x-rays, check your prostate. . .or I could sell you some great weed for $50.'

'We don't have a health plan but our accountant knows Reiki.'

"It's just that you might find food a lot cheaper!"

Just think if that meteor had never hit planet earth 65 million years ago...

"The doctor says your injury is not serious...we're going home."

"I thought you said you were dating a rich doctor!"

"We’ve been told to cut the drugs budget so in future Louella here will be chanting away your pain."

'Laughter is not always the best medicine, Mr. Jonic.'

"Any pain relief with the cannabis?"

Acupressure Gauge

"Well Doctor, I thought if a placebo works, this might as well..."

"This is just a placebo cast, but it makes a lot of people feel better."

"If you ask me, your Christmas gift return policy is too liberal."