Allotment Artist Gifts

Man halfway through growing a scarecrow

Prize vegetables.

Allotment

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

An old man growing berries

This is NOT 'nipping out'.

Homegrown solutions for a smaller carbon footprint.

So those are your 'weapons of mass destruction? - Slugs?

"Let's say an immediate $10.00 allowance increase plus an annual 8% cost of living raise and I'll call him off."

'Not here, Fred.'

'The only thing I'm sure of is death and taxes and home work.'

"What are you growing?"

'Apart from Charlie here, I don't have any problems with slugs'

'I grow all our tomatoes. I grow all our spinach. All you do is complain about the cost of my twice weekly manicures.'

Sheds

"Must've planted those seeds upside down..."

'Is my allowance a form of income redistribution?'

"Why don't other people ever do this?"

'The dog ate the flash drive with my homework on it...but I hope to get it back real soon!'

He was forced to take early retirement.

Middle Distance Runners

Hell's Allotment Holders.

Agreeing to Disagree Mediators...Open.

'I purchased this great book on time management but, with my schedule, I can't find the time to read it.'

Sign on shed reads 'Gone to seed.'

'You can always recognise a true gardener - out there before the weather actually gets nice enough for venturing into the garden.'

"My biggest problem is squatters."

'I'm done with school because all I need to make a living is to know how to persuade my dad to give me money!'

"Those are my money managers."

"I can't wait until I'm old enough to vote for a guaranteed minimum allowance."

"Still trying to grow mushy peas,Alf?"

Birds laughing at a scarecrow.

'Even with free medical, dental, room and board, I'm still not making it on this allowance.'

Gardening Angel.

"Oops...nothing but IOUs I never paid back!"