Allotment Admirer Gifts

"Why don't other people ever do this?"

Prize vegetables.

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

"So, the Scharfs have an atoll. Big deal."

Allotment

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

An old man growing berries

This is NOT 'nipping out'.

'Apart from Charlie here, I don't have any problems with slugs'

'I grow all our tomatoes. I grow all our spinach. All you do is complain about the cost of my twice weekly manicures.'

"Nemesisyphus"

Find out who has the Licensing Rights to Armegeddon.

Dog Realtor

"Must've planted those seeds upside down..."

"My Lord, you said you'd walk with me, but I only see one set of footprints."

"Ed's security blanket. Two hundred and twenty acres!"

William and Real Estate

'...and the temperature is controlled by a thermostat which keeps it at a controlled zero year round.'

He was forced to take early retirement.

Apartments for rent. Central Air!

'You wrecked ANOTHER snowmobile?'

Man halfway through growing a scarecrow

"My biggest problem is squatters."

People putting their grocery shopping into shopping carts that are cornucopias.

Post future today

The Globe

Man with world on his shoulders

'Let's get away from the hustle and bustle of the city, and buy a second igloo someplace.'

Gardening Angel.

'Low Temperature Physics Lab'

"I hid your eggs in a glacier that's calving."

Birds laughing at a scarecrow.

'Now that's big money!'

"Well, that's the last of it, which means we just ate thirty years' worth of food in two weeks."

"Of course, it's hard to tell what a place really looks like without furniture."