Airport Travel Gifts

"I'm sorry, but your make-up exceeds your weight allowance."

Carefree luggage.

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

Airlines

Airport Security.

Fight or Flight

"I always check 2 bags, but one's just a sacrifice to the luggage gods."

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

"No flight of the Bumblebee"

'Oh great. Our luggage has been sent to Alpha Centauri.'

'Thank you for flying Canine Airlines. You can now sit on the furniture.'

'What was that?!' 'A 'Mach'-ing bird.'

"It was a holiday I'll never forget...I saw life in the raw!"

"Do we have to go to the beach? I think the airline mixed up my luggage."

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

Flight attendant piloting Santa's sleigh.

Airplane Mode.

The Scanner Of Love.

"Passengers, as we begin our descent, you may now suddenly act open and friendly to the person beside you."

"Now boarding group 50 and up."

Airport

I travelled to get away from it all. All I got away from was my luggage.

Technique #54 airlines are adopting for handling excessive carry on luggage.

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

Disinformation booth.

Einstein discovers that time can stop completely.

"Rule #1: don't offer to carry anything!"

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

Why Superman flies himself

Excess Baggage: Why can't airports provide a decent place for paying customers to catch forty winks?

A tourist struggling with loads of luggage

"I try to drink a lot of water, stay up and get right on L.A. time, and never eat the airline food."

"... And in the event of a sudden change in cabin pressure, please tweet with the hashtag #FeelinTheBreeze."

Witch takes off on a runway surrounded by planes.

"We are now in 'The Galley,' where flight attendants scavenge for food, hoard magazines, hide from passengers and over share details of their personal lives."