Airport Experiences Gifts

A tourist struggling with loads of luggage

Nothing to Declare: 'Are we there yet?'

Last chance to tell your bomb joke

"As a frequent flier, you'll be entitled to stay in our airport lounge for up to a week during delays."

'Are you sure you're not wearing anything you bought overseas?'

"I don't think you'll need to worry about that for a while."

"As a courtesy for the inconvenience, please accept a voucher for three additional hours of your life, redeemable upon your death."

"How's my tripping you up?"

"No way!!"

Flights suspended snowstorm

"Well, Jenkins, there's the problem! You have it set on 'broil'!"

Airlines

Airport Security.

I travelled to get away from it all. All I got away from was my luggage.

'Travel really opens the mind...I'd never seen such despair, such desperation, people who've lost ALL hope...and that was just at Heathrow!'

Flight insurance and fright insurance.

Pirates on holiday.

Excess Baggage: Perhaps you should have washed those clothes before returning home from your overseas vacation.

'. . .Please make yourself comfortable in the Edward Snowden Lounge.'

'Airport Check in' "Groping or non-groping"

Airport Security. Sir, one of your tubs is empty. That one's got my dignity!

"Now boarding group 50 and up."

"I always check 2 bags, but one's just a sacrifice to the luggage gods."

'Nobody ever before had took much notice of Granny's homemade flour-sack bloomers.'

'At this time, we would like to call those passengers who feel compelled to board before their row numbers are announced.'

Airport

Rubbish Carousel

Airport

Jet flies by. 'And of course it's handy for the airport.'

"As a courtesy for the inconvenience, please accept a voucher for three additional hours of your life, redeemable upon your death."

'My husband, Bill, works at the airport - I still haven't opened my birthday presents from three years ago.'

"Let the epicurean feast commence."

'Jenkins won the health savings award with his suggestion that we have our employee hernia checks done at the airport by TSA agents.'

Gates A-C: Johnson, Davis, Potts, surprise me!

The International Airline Basketball Tournament