Airplane Aficionado Gifts

"It's the part about 60 take-offs and 54 landings that worries us."

The Birth of an Air Traffic Controller

"It's mine—and I'd appreciate your not looking out of it."

First biofuel commercial airline flight.

"Please remain seated, we're waiting for clearance to resume our flight."

"I love making a glide in..."

"Miss, I'm familiar with the 'Fasten Seatbelt' sign, but what's with the 'Check Engine' light?"

'Check on Olson - looks like he nodded off again.'

Captain Pointy No.14 - Falling out a loop the loop

"It's empty back there, skipper, a large group of clairvoyants cancelled at the last minute."

An air traffic controller is startled when an airplane comes out of his radar screen.

'Quantity Air' jumbo jet loading with passengers.

'. . . Just thought I'd drop you a mime!'

Uncertain future of the Boeing Dreamliner.

The new post office contract slashes passenger tickets by 50%.

"Don't you know who I am?! I demand an upgrade! I'm a platinum-plus frequent fly..."

Chasing Propeller

"This is your captain speaking, we hope you have a pleasant and safe journey but obviously accidents can happen!"

No Loitering

"Please tell me you're blind."

"Do you have anything to declare besides a rabbit, handsaw, pigeon, curtain, and deck of cards?"

How often do the planes fly overhead..?

Don Quixote

"I'm afraid your luggage is too large, sir. We'll have to charge a fee."

"Our most extensive European tour for those in a hurry. The plane never lands."

"But you can't work remote, you're a pilot."

I'm sorry, lady, but luggage lost in Toledo, STAYS in Toledo.

"What are the odds? A therapist and his star patient seated next to each other on a fourteen-hour flight? It's like we both just won the lottery!"

First Class Travel

"Is there a pilot in the house?"

"It's still too heavy. What if instead of two armrets we just share one?"

"Oh these are just my in-flight baby scream cancelling headphones."

"Look, there's even more buttons and stuff up there."

Fasten Seatbelt

Shock Absorber and Environmental Ideas that Failed: Recycled Springs from Box Spring Mattresses.