Aeroplane Aficionado Gifts

"I don't tolerate unruly passengers."

Words you don't ever want to hear: 'I keep forgetting - east, is that to the left or the right of north?'

'I bet that new guy can't wait to tell a bunch of tall tales about where he's been and stuff...'

"First, though, we'll be boarding all our bald business travellers who've been asking a ton of interesting questions for the past forty-five minutes."

You're Fired.

Airlines

Walking Luggage.

"We're airship people, not mega-airship people."

"He built his own airplane from a kit."

'What's with the overnight bag, Orville?'

'What was that?!' 'A 'Mach'-ing bird.'

Cat chases mouse across a Zeppelin.

'Oh great. Our luggage has been sent to Alpha Centauri.'

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

The World's Easiest Airport

The World Wide Web.

'I'm on my way!'

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

You must be this tall.

"At least this year she got rid of the seat belts."

‘I've cleared the morning, but you've got bandits at twelve o'clock ...'

"Well, Comstock, still regret putting our profits back into research?"

A private jet takes off

Employee of the Month Parking

An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.

"Sorry, you're only allowed one carrion."

"You shouldn't have stopped to go to the bathroom, sir - you were late claiming your luggage, so we raffled it off."

"I hear they serve Australian swamp rat in first."

Einstein discovers that time can stop completely.

'I'm sorry. I probably should have talked to to you before I took down our wedding photo and put up a picture of my jet.'

Kamikaze Colour

Tiny air ship flying over globe.

Airport Bored Rooms

"Old timers are quick to tell me that the drive to Abilene was different in their day."

"Damn it, are we flying a spoonful of peas again?"