Airline Antics Enthusiast Gifts

"What already?"

Airport Security.

'Oh great. Our luggage has been sent to Alpha Centauri.'

'I'm not taking that money to buy drugs. I'm taking it to pay bribes if I'm caught with my drugs.'

"Arr, we found your luggage, Captain."

"It's my helper trout!"

"Old timers are quick to tell me that the drive to Abilene was different in their day."

'Are we there yet! Are we there yet! Are we there yet!'

'Hmmph. Here's an ad for affordable housing five minutes from downtown. By what means? Learjet?'

Vampire on a plane

"How's my tripping you up?"

Fume Leaks on aeroplane - 'Perfume? Drinks? Air?'

'He's trying to figure out why airplanes get bigger while seats get smaller.'

Welcome to business class. Are you a member of big business or small business?

Emergency Slide Height Limit.

Woman goes to Origami Airport.

Flight Crew Lockdown Check List

'There he goes over the bag limit again!'

Going to Work. . .Coming Home

'Wayne, your turn - Darren needs changing!'

"I know what the airlines charge to check a bag is outrageous, but. . ."

On the monitors behind the check-in desk: Arrivals/Departures/Donations

"And that one shows my frequent flier miles."

'Hello, this is your captain speaking... I'm on the next flight!'

The Headless Horseman claims his luggage.

"You have luggage? - Oh, we don't do LUGGAGE any more."

"Flight time is approximately 3 seconds and - I won't lie to you folks - it's a bit choppy up there."

Excess Baggage: Meanwhile, back at baggage handlers university...

"That's why you're so familiar, we flew together yesterday!"

"I can't believe they put us in dog class!"

"How many bags to check in, sir?" "Only one piece of hand luggage." (case in the shape of a giraffe).

"As a frequent flier, you'll be entitled to stay in our airport lounge for up to a week during delays."

Two birds refuel.

'Would yo like reading or non-reading?'

"Ladies and gentlemen, please direct your attention to the safety presentation. It's the only way you'll know the difference between the harmless scarlet kingsnake and the deadly Eastern coral snake."