Air Travel Humor Enthusiast Gifts

Fred Didn't Enjoy the Airline Version of Space Invaders.

'Oh great. Our luggage has been sent to Alpha Centauri.'

Vampire on a plane

"I'll put this device onto flight mode when you put this plane onto flight mode."

'As a matter-of-fact I didn't pack my own bags...Well,well, well...Speak of the devil!'

"O.K., you're good. Next!"

"Well, that's just great! I guess pigs don't fly after all!"

A signaller directing pallbearers

"Flight time is approximately 3 seconds and - I won't lie to you folks - it's a bit choppy up there."

The Problem with the TSA

'Stealth broom.'

Two birds refuel.

"I always end up next to the weirdo!"

"Please remove your shoes, realize you forgot to wear socks, accept your fate, and make peace with your god."

Sometimes they need the oxygen mask after they see the new baggage fees.

'Sorry sir, the 'No Steak and Lobster Jokes' sign just came on.'

The first in-flight meal: "Care for some soup?"

Travel Law #135: Those with window seats are the last to arrive.' People climb over other passengers on an airplane.

'Those new airport scanners can see through clothes!'

"I'm sorry, but the flight of the bumblebees has been cancelled."

Two witches at airport waiting with signs: One says 'Dorothy' and the other one says 'And Your Little Dog Too!'

"How long would it take to cook my goose? I have a camel train to catch..."

"Hey, thanks again for letting me borrow your pen."

Lost Luggage/Lost Passengers

"You think you're annoyed? The acoustics in here are terrible!"

"Funny hey, my mum's advice on 'travel essentials' is 'don't pack a toothbrush'..."

'Look, I didn't know they had salad bars on these flights...'

'Once you're seated and have safely stowed all carry-ons, we'll start the bidding for seat belts.'

'This will hurt you more than it will hurt me.'

Grim reaper struggles to get his scythe in the overhead locker of an aeroplane.

What really killed the dinsaurs.

'It's the last time I fly with a no-frills airline!'

'You've got to admire their candor.'

Budget motel - wifi, Hbo and bed bugs.

'Welcome to crash-test flight 000. Go ahead and take your seat!'