Aircraft Assembly Fitter Gifts

A day in the life of an aircraft assembly fitter...'

Employee of the Month Parking

"Rule #1: don't offer to carry anything!"

'And don't be afraid to ask for directions.'

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

Going to Work. . .Coming Home

Mechanics, their forks ready, prepare to deice the chocolate off a plane.

Jet Liner Wipes 'I tell ya, cleanin' the fuselage used to be my least favorite job...'

RAF plane ride.

Old fashioned aeroplane with propeller.

"Be careful - we've seen an alarming increase in the number of plane strikes."

Ferdinand von Zeppelin

"Here we go....in-flight refueling."

Multiple Migs

"The air feels cleaner, for some reason."

'Fasten yourself to your seats please.'

'Lose another wrench to that black hole that sucks up all tools the instant you drop it?'

'Here's the problem,the pilot light went out.'

'I went to wash the wheels on that European Airbus A380 by myself. I didn't know it had 22 wheels.'

Penguins going for flying lessons

'There's really no need for confusion. Page 95, section 33, paragraph L clearly explains ...'

"Sorry, my mistake, I thought the dating agency said, 'a plain speaking man', 'bye."

Flat pack sales assistant

Bird comes in for a crash landing.

Crowded Air Travel

Stewardess advising passengers to fix aeroplane with duct tape if any problems.

Things haven't been the same around the county since TWA merged with Ed's Crop Dusting Service.

"Turn back. The K27 has been superseded by the bigger, faster and more heavily armed K28."

"No one wants a drink, no one wants a snack...I don't know who I am anymore."

"If you're selling, I couldn't offer more than fifteen hundred for the machine. It looks like it's had a lot of miles on it."

"Stop scratching your head. I know you've got an itchy scalp, but the passengers get the wrong impression."

Buying Airplanes (New or Used)

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