Aging Process Ponderer Gifts

"I thought this would be the year I'd come for you, but I guess not. So I got you a birthday card instead!"

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

'Doctor, I don't want to eat mouseburgers, I want to be normal like everybody else.'

"Hello - I'm from the future..."

"I advised a patient to take responsibilty for his own actions, and now he is suing me!"

'I've used up all my eligibilities'

The Male Atom: Sex, Sport, War and Good Intentions.

'I'm doing a school report on 'the aging process,' Dad -- can I interview you?'

"When will I be old enough to have an inner child?"

Max Weber

"I've been studying reverse psychology at Tonga Tech Online University."

'When 900 years you reach, retire, you will not.'

Telling Self to Buzz Off

That's no big deal, a lot of people get Siskel and Ebert mixed up

Caption Contest TK

'Well, that brings us up to my third birthday...'

"I don't know why I'm here - I don't need a haircut."

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

'It's not just his insane jealousy - he also insists on choosing all my clothes.'

"Would you look at the carrot on that guy!"

"I don't get this whole age thing...I waited all year to turn nine, but now I don't feel any older!"

"See, the problem with doing things to prolong your life is that all the extra years come at the end, when you're old."

"I utilize the best from Freud, the best from Jung and the best from my uncle Marty, a very smart fellow."

'I'm too small for my age: I keep being rejected...'

The Collective Unconscious

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

"If I can control everyone around me it would help my damaged self esteem."

'Don't you find watching people relaxing?'

Bipolar bear.

"The dotted line is my self-esteem."

"Could I be PATHOLOGICALLY normal?"